1st post of 2010: thoughts on being a teacher

So my blog and website has been generally ignored for the past year and that needs to be remedied.

There's a lot I've wanted to write about but have held back.

When I started my blog in 2004 (I can't believe it's been that long) I was working as an administrative assistant for KVEO and had just returned to school in an attempt to get my degree. Having graduated during the summer of 2008 - Summa Cum Laude - I am now in my second year of teaching Art for IDEA Public Schools in Mission. IDEA a district of public charter schools.

A lot has happened.

When I was working as an administrative assistant I had a lot of computer time so it was easy for me to document my life. Once I quit my job and focused on school I had a little less time for blogging and once I began teaching...most of my free time was spent relaxing, destressing and planning.

I don't think there are many things that can compare to the stress and frustration of being a new teacher. In my case add alternative certification, charter school and brand new school lacking, in my opinion, strong new teacher support.

I wish I'd written more down. Of course what has held me back is how to voice the frustration I felt. My blog is not private and I certainly don't want to burn bridges by publicly venting or criticizing. I will admit that I was seriously considering quitting in November of '08. I spent a lot planning time sitting in my car crying those first few months.

The good thing is that the things that most stressed me out are fading and that comes down to practice. Teaching art, I'm given a Do Over with each new semester so technically I'm on my 4th go round. I'm slowly beginning to learn my job and willing to be open with the kids about the things I'm not so good at but am open to improving. In general, they seem to like being able to provide me feedback and make suggestions and LOVE IT when I implement their suggestions. I'm also learning how to be more positive and less negative. Instead of saying "you MUST do something this way" I'm saying to them "challenge yourself to try it that way." It is still far from perfect. I still don't have lesson pacing down, I'm not always clear with my kids as to the direction we are going and I am still learning how to ensure it is a good learning environment for everyone but I'm moving in a generally forward direction.

One of the things I didn't realize was how solitary and isolating teaching was going to be. We talk about Teams and we talk about Learning Communities but in the end it's just me and the kids each day.

In Frank McCourt's book Teacher Man he wrote, "You are with the kids and, as long as you want to be a teacher, there's no escape. Don't expect help from the people who've escaped the classroom, the higher-ups. They're busy going to lunch and thinking higher thoughts. It's you and the kids...Find what you love and do it."

That book was one of the things that made me feel better about the job I was doing. First of all, I am getting the opportunity to teach what I love even if it isn't a TAKS testing subject and there's no conclusive evidence that students who take Art classes do better on standardized tests, and I have no clue what my budget is and it's rare that someone actually comes to observe me...but still...I get to teach Art. Second, kids are kids - many of the classroom management issues he was dealing with 50 years ago are the same issues we are dealing with today. Yes, somethings have changed, but let's face it - kids are kids.

Well, so now that I'm beginning to wrap my mind around what I need to do to improve myself as a teacher I'm going to take the leap into a new school. Not just a new place but to another brand new IDEA charter school in Alamo. Am I crazy? This one is going to specialize in The Arts, Culture and Technology. The Arts...how can I not take the leap? I'm really excited about the opportunities and the possibilities.

As I finish up this year and begin making the move to the new school next year I am going to try to be better about documenting my life with posts longer than a Twitter or a Facebook update. We'll see how it goes.

On the Art side of life...I sent my first piece to an out of state show! I'm waiting to hear if I got accepted to another one. My goal is to try to enter 1 non-local show per quarter. I am also going to have my very first solo show ever. It will be a 2D show because it will be at the Blue Onion restaurant but still...it's a show. 2010 is going to be a good year.